Family Ties

Recently, when I was with my family in Oregon, I had a strong realization of just how wonderful my relatives are. I hadn’t seen them in years; I still pictured my cousins as middle-schoolers, but in reality they are finishing high school or already graduated from college and working as engineers or in AmeriCorps. We were all in a room together and I looked around at my siblings and cousins and the obvious struck me as profound. We’re all grown up. We’re adults. We’re no longer playing with Lincoln Logs in our grandparents’ basement or getting all seven of us wrestling/sliding down their carpeted stairs in one big pile. And even though, as the generations go, we would now still sit at the “kids’ table” at Christmas, we have outgrown the name, not to mention the chairs.

The feeling I felt most strongly was a draw to the women in my family - to my two aunts, and also my two great-aunts. We were saying goodbye to my grandma, so maybe that affected how I was taking time to appreciate everyone there. The women in my family are very special, very loving, and very fun. I feel a renewed connection to my aunts and a pull to grow closer to them now. It’s strange that I hadn’t felt this way before. I always really liked them and enjoyed the time we spent together, but this was different. Maybe it’s because I’m an adult now and so we view each other differently. Maybe it’s all just a new perspective on my part.

There was one thing that especially touched my heart.
My aunt Julie mentioned a time when I was 18 months old and my parents brought us up for a visit. She said that when it was time for us to leave she didn’t want to let me go, and she remembers that moment. When we were saying goodbye this last time I held my hugs longer and I didn’t want to leave them. As I walked away down the hall I heard my aunt saying “it’s just like she’s 18 months old again.” I almost cried. That was such sweet moment to me, and I don’t think she even knew I heard her. I don’t really even know how to describe how I felt, knowing that she felt that attachment to me, even though the gaps between visits seem to, unfortunately, grow wider and wider as the years goes by.

I resolve to deepen these relationships.